Forgiveness is one ingredient that is becoming scarce in most relationship these days; but without forgiveness, there is hardly a relationship, whether the couples involved are married or yet to be. It could even be friends or neighbors; it doesn’t matter.
It becomes necessary to forgive, because as humans we are bound to be offended in our daily affairs and relationship; and nothing hurts more than to be aggrieved by those we truly love and cherish the most.
There are many who have been wronged and claimed to have forgiven and forgotten; but is the claim really true?
Harboring hatred and hurt is not good for the body and mind in the long run, and if anyone truly wants to live a healthy life, it’s very important that you learn the art of forgiveness.
We need to understand what forgiveness is to be really sure that we have truly forgiven someone.
What Is Forgiveness?
Simply put, forgiveness is the act of excusing a mistake or offence against you. It’s a most noble art worth emulating; and very few people have the mind and guts to actually forgive. When you truly forgive someone, you don’t bring up the offense again in the future or hold it against the people.
Some people claim to have forgiven but are quick to bring the offense up when the occasion warrants. That is not true forgiveness. As long as you nurse innate anger and ill feelings towards the offender, you have not truly forgiven.
Dangers of Nursing Un-Forgiveness
Many are quick to say these words “I will never forgive you for this” but lack the foresight to see that they are doing themselves more harm than good. Lack of forgiveness has the potential of doing you more harm than good; and if we were to go into the details of the dangers of inhabiting un-forgiveness, we will be here till next year. Yes, we could write volumes on how un-forgiveness could really harm you; psychologically, emotionally, socially, health-wise and even physically.
Suffice to say that un-forgiveness drains your power and rationality; and the offender would have won the deal. Nursing anger and ill notions as a result of an offense does you no good. It could give you sleepless nights, ulcers, headaches, etc.
It is truly not worth it.
And if you do eventually exact your revenge, you will have that feeling of emptiness.
There is a saying that “To forgive is divine”. I don’t know how true but I do know that there are more than a million reasons why humans, like yourself and myself, should forgive persons that do wrong us.
- It frees you
You might ask me, “Is nursing revenge against someone a burden?” You can ask me again. Of course it is! People who have walked that road will tell you that it’s no easy burden.
- Gives you the upper hand
The offender will be under you. You would have overpowered him / her just by telling the person you have forgiven; and meaning it. There is no greater power; I think.
Also, forgiveness brings harmony, togetherness, indebtedness, loyalty and true bond and most importantly a healthy mind and soul. That is, if the person is wise.
Whether it’s a cheating partner, a gossiping friend or even character assassination, the ability and willingness to forgive not only portrays maturity but gives you the winning card and frees your mind to truly succeed and excel in life.
Though forgiveness in our modern time seems to be a lost art, with a little practice and willingness, it sure is achievable and you will enjoy that joy that flows in when you truly forgive.